Thanks in the Living…

This morning, I have a thankful heart that has been awakened by God’s presence and His word. I also have a heavy heart–only by His grace can they coincide. Heaviness reaped in hormones, in the struggle with infertility, in the sadness and grief of death and grave sickness of family and friends, in the complete oblivion and lostness of those close to me, in the numbness of the lives of those living to merely survive. Thankfulness born of His Spirit that lifts my eyes to His word, His truth, His hope in the midst of so much pain around me…
We have to make a point to turn our eyes toward thanks–look up from our emotion and circumstance and pray for recognition. Here is where I give thanks in the midst of living…

The hope given in the life, death and resurrection of Christ who took the wrath that I deserved for my sin and rebellion and bore it that I might have life and relationship with God. There is no wrath or anger from God toward me–all love and mercy. His faithful fatherly hand grows and matures me every day for His glory. This is amazing–no mere consolation prize–my very hope and life!

Health to live and move and love.

The gift of my husband–who has taught me more about God and His word than he thinks–by word and deed. And, he’s pretty funny–we always get a laugh from one another!

My sweet dog, Bailey, who loves and snuggles and plays. She is a gift during this time of simple joy in the midst of pain.

Bailey and Jen romping in the leaves

The family that God has blessed me with who love me, laugh with me and encourage me. From Tennessee to Texas…

All the in-laws in Texas--minus Hunter...

Plus Hunter:)

My sisters, Lynn and Beth

Aunt Nank and Mom

Nieces and Nephews in a pose I made them do:)--Andrew, Brittany, Joel, Sarah, Stephen

Friends that listen, sharpen and speak truth to me–old, new, tried and true. These last few years have included transitions and some isolation due to circumstance. I appreciate the friends who stick closer than a brother even in the midst of their changes. I am blessed, and sometimes I forget it.

The growth and opportunities in WDC. So many people have stepped up to give, pray and encourage. I am blessed to have this opportunity to walk alongside young women and women of all ages to help them ‘think God’s thoughts after Him.’ The gospel has come alive this summer and fall to many, and I thank Him for that.

WDC retreat at the lake in October--Laura, Jen, Liz and Lillie

Fall Equipping for Discipleship Class

The opportunities God has given me to rest in Him in beautiful places. I love the way His creation displays His beauty so well.

My favorite place in the world, Fripp Island.

My second favorite place on earth

The way God’s word keeps coming alive to me more and more as I study it. This fall, I started attending a Precept study with my sis and friends. We have studied the first half of Matthew, and I cannot wait for the second half of Matthew in the spring. It is really teaching me more and more to study the Bible from itself. Great stuff!

So thankful for our church, Fellowship Church, and the focus on the Gospel, discipleship, and serving.

The opportunity to go to Chicago to the Gospel Coalition spending time out of town with Greg, Rick and Teresa Dunn.

Jen and Greg at Wrigley Field, April 2009

So thankful for the life of adventure that lies ahead–it is a faith journey with beauty along the way. There are huge unknowns in our life right now–especially about children. As I was driving home from the WDC retreat in October, I came across this scene. It depicts beauty and blessing in the now, the road of the unknown ahead–uphill (we only see what is right in front of us) and God’s faithfulness for bringing growth and life in the lone tree and the blue sky. Such comfort to know that He is the God of whatever is lying on the other side of that hill–motherhood, childlessness, adoption. I do not have to worry about the other side of that hill right now–I praise Him for this side. I have been reminded so much this year of looking to eternity and Him as my hope and not looking for reward in the here and now. I am thankful for the many ways He blesses me–especially with the knowledge of Him.

Life in 2009

Happy Thanksliving,
Jen

How the corner was turned…

For those of you who have known me for any amount of time, you know that I have never loved Wal-mart. It brought the dread of fingernails on a chalkboard for me to venture there–crowds of families of 10 standing in the middle of aisles, small aisles. It’s like people get stupid when they walk in the doors standing in the middle of aisles, staring at product. I much preferred Target’s wide aisles, cool product, and sense of cleanliness.
In the last couple of years, it has become a necessity to be a part of the Wal-mart adventure because of finances. They really are cheaper. There are very few things that they are more expensive on. So, I would gather my strength and go early on Mondays. I did not like it, but I knew it was wise. It became part of my regular routine.
Over the year, I have come to dread it less. In fact, I do not even complain anymore. I, gulp…, kind of like it now. The main reason is not because of the low prices or convenience. The main reason is because of something that God has done in my heart.
There are so many places in my life right now that people make me feel comfortable, look like me, sound like me, speak my language (literally and figuratively). That can get claustrophobic. That can make you pretty selfish. That is not reality.
When I walk into Wal-mart, God says to my heart, “look around, see those hurting, living life in need, wanting to be noticed.” I see people from all different nationalities, all socioeconomic levels, living in all kinds of drama or boredom. I have had opportunities to smile, interact, pray, share with those alone and in need. Not every time have I taken the opportunity to live outside of myself, but when I prepare my heart to be open, God has blessed me with humility and brokenness over the needs of others.
This is gross, but I think I used to think I was above Wal-mart. Then, again, I am reminded of the Gospel. Christ condescended to us–messy, crowded hearts, full of drama and boredom, haters. He walked into our lives and loved us physically, emotionally, spiritually. He reached out to the least of these calling for us to repent and follow Him. There may be no other place in my life where it is more real to carry the message of the Gospel than to my neighborhood Wal-mart. Pretty amazing what God can teach us in the everyday. Pretty amazing that He shows me that I am exactly like everyone else in there–in need and sometimes clueless to my need. When I left Wal-mart last week, I left with a joy in my heart and thankfulness for His mercy. I did not see that one coming!